"Mind," said someone, "mind the same thing does not befall you, that befell one of my neighbors, whose gold was turned into muck."
Being asked to relate that dream, he said:
My neighbor one night dreamt that the devil had led him into a field to dig out gold.
When he had found a good lot: "You are not allowed to carry it away now," quoth the demon; "but mark the place, that you may be alone to know it again."
The man enquired what sign he could well use: "Cack here," replied the devil. "It is the best way that nobody should suspect there is gold. None but you will have cognizance of the matter."
The man thought that a good plan, and, awaking forthwith, became aware that he had abominably loosened his bowels in the bed. Rising amid the muck and stench to leave the house, he set on the crown of his head a cap wherein the cat had just done its needs. Enraged at the horrible smell, he had to go and wash the filth off his head and hair. Thus the golden dream had turned to turd.
Then he cried out, "Lord, why did you leave the mess here for me while taking away the gold? You would have had as much use for the one as for the other!"
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Revised March 21, 2016.