Oh, yes, one more thing. For the first time in ten years, I also had pride in a president who, when he left the aircraft carrier, didn't steal everything that wasn't nailed down.

"Huh? What?" I can just hear some of you saying. Yes, you heard me aright...He didn't steal everything that wasn't nailed down! Soccer Mom America has a very short memory, especially when that memory is controlled by the liberal-Marxist press.

It's summer, 9 years ago, and Traitor-in-Chief Bill Clinton rides the USS Roosevelt to the D-Day celebrations in Normandy, France. Remember? Not only did he fake the finding of stones on the Normandy beach which he rearranged into a cross (the stones had been placed on the beach by a White House staffer) but when he and his royal entourage left the Roosevelt, thousands of dollars in towels, bath and kitchen accessories left with them. After all, a guy's gotta have a few souvenirs, doesn't he???

Since the Navy pays about a grand a piece for a toilet seat, I can only shudder to think what the price of a coffee cup is!

I mention this since during the last week, the people's tribune, West Virginia Senator Robert Byrd, has become the champion of the taxpayer in his remonstrance against the wasteful expenditures incurred by the president's flight to the Abraham Lincoln. Among other things, he condemned the president for using the military to stage a political "show."

Now, Bill Clinton never did that, did he? Like in Normandy?

In the light of Clinton's theft (and to be honest here, the majority of the theft was committed by Clinton's staff) Bush's trip to the Abraham Lincoln was a basement bargain.

But people who hie from West Virginia shouldn't throw stones--especially klansman Byrd. I was perusing the website of an organization called "Citizens Against Government Waste," an organization devoted to unearthing all the pork in the Federal budget. There, you can look up pork spending on a state by state basis. It was by sheerest coincidence that I stumbled upon the statistics for West Virginia.

Initially I thought I would just add up the grand total of all the pork spending in West Virginia. However, it dawned on me that I wouldn't get any sleep for the next twelve years. So, let's take just a few examples. If you want the complete story, you can visit their web page yourself and read it, if you have nothing to do for the next twelve years.

West Liberty State College is a small (approximately 3,000 students or slightly less) podunk college in the pan handle of West Virginia. I know this because I teach at a small podunk college a hundred miles to the east that plays them in our NCAA division. I also have a very good friend who teaches philosophy there. Apart from being podunk in just about everything, our two colleges have some of the best philosophy departments in the country between them.

In the current Federal budget, West Liberty State is scheduled to receive a whopping 1.7 million dollars for...internet access in every college dorm room. That's right, 1.7 million dollars of the money extorted from you is to go to college students so they can play games on the internet. They can't read, they can't write, but, boy, they sure need that internet access!!! And they need it at federal expense!

Now, I know the complaint that will be lodged against me: "Well, the University of Pittsburgh does the same thing!" Yeah, it sure does, and I'm just as agin' it here as I'm agin' it there. Did the University of Pittsburgh receive any federal funds to wire its own dormitories for internet access? Truth be told, I don't know. But as a state related university, it sure received money from the state of Pennsylvania for it.

In the words of David Gelertner, college "students" (and I use that term lightly) need federally funded access to the internet about as much as they need federally funded transportation to the nearest shopping mall.

In the ten years or so since internet and computer access became de rigeur for college students I've noticed only one thing about student quality--it has declined drastically. The internet is only a tool, and if you can't read or write to begin with, no tool is going to change that.

An orangutang can't use a screw driver. Giving him a Ferrari doesn't teach him how to drive. Please, don't misunderstand me. I've nothing against orangutangs.

Glenville State College is getting 2.7 million from the federal tooth fairy for a campus community education center. Pardon me, but I thought a college already was a community education center. And it has a campus, too, doesn't it?

But the biggest college pork pie goes to Wheeling Jesuit University in the sum of 5.4 million dollars!!! Part of that will go to build a National Technology Transfer Center. I suppose it will transfer technology, but from whom or to whom I haven't a clue. If this were still the Clinton years, my guess is it would be part of the Chinese Cultural Studies Center.

Another portion of that pie will fund an initiative for science and mathematics education, about 3.6 million of it. Gee, my mistake. For that they will have to import Asian students. I guess that's where the technology transfer center will come in.

My college does all that on the cheap. You see, we have an initiative for science and mathematics education, too. It's called the Natural Sciences Division and the Department of Mathematics. The combined faculty salaries in those divisions wouldn't even get a sneeze from Senator Byrd.

For that matter, we have an initiative for philosophy education which is a real K-Mart special.

There is one thing that I did have the time to total up--it's the federal spending on highways in West Virginia. It comes to 51 million dollars. This money won't just go for US interstates. The majority of it is to be spent on state and county roads, including the construction of something called the "canvas bridge." In the past, Senator Byrd has been taken to task for this unusually large portion of the highway bloat in Wild, Wonderful, West Virginia. He's defended it by claiming that the whole country uses the roads of West Virginia!

Well, that may be true, but, may I add, only when we have to!

But I must say, I really enjoyed the Senator's appearance in the movie Gods and Generals. He was on the screen for about 3 seconds and kept his mouth shut.

As my parents use to tell me, "Liberals should be seen and not heard." It's a good rule for former klansmen as well.