Frantically, I turned on the computer to access his web site at www.warroom.com. In the back of my mind was the horrifying thought that the same hit squad that had done in Vince Foster and 40 odd "friends of Bill" had also gotten to Quinn. Nothing of the sort had happened! "Whew!" Clear Channel had finally come to its senses and syndicated the most popular morning talk show in Pittsburgh. I found Quinn and his producer, the lovely Radio Rose, broadcasting out of Wheeling, West Virginia on the "Big" ll70.

As my blood pressure returned to normal, I heard Rose give a wonderful definition of a liberal: "Anyone who does everything for 'the children,'...including abort them."

Since I was in the middle of a drink of orange juice as I heard this, I couldn't stop choking long enough to laugh.

By Wednesday morning, the temperature in Johnstown had plummetted to a balmy 9 degrees above zero. I was perusing my favorite internet news site, Worldnet Daily, when my eyes spied a headline that read, "Global warming causing the extinction of thousands of species." I looked out my office window to see a landscape that could only be compared to Antarctica.

Darn those liberals. They've been promising me global warming for at least l5 years now. Why can't they ever deliver on their promises? You'd think they were a bunch of politicians.

Speaking of liberals, Democrat presidential wannabe, Howie Dean, has, as they say, "got religion." He now claims the reason he signed the Vermont law giving marital benefits to same sex partners (also known as 'sodomites') was due to his Christian faith. In an action that was amazing for a liberal, Dean actually tried to make an argument. Speaking in Muscatine, Iowa, on Wednesday, he was quoted in the Washington Post as saying:

"From a religious point of view, if God had thought homosexuality is [sic] a sin, he would not have created gay people."

This kind of argument is called an 'enthymeme' since it's left up to the reader to provide at least one extra premise (i.e., 'God created gay people') and then draw the conclusion (i.e., 'God doesn't think homosexuality is a sin').

This is a quite dangerous piece of thinking (if we use the word 'thinking' loosely). Other Democrats may pick it up, and soon we'll hear arguments like:

"If God thought rape,murder and torture were sins, then He wouldn't have created Saddam Hussein."

I leave it to the reader to provide the missing premise and draw the appropriate conclusion.

Perhaps liberals should be forced to undergo a five day waiting period and background check before the're permitted to use logic.

Like any good socialist paper, the Post went on to give arguments in favor of the Dean position on sodomy, arguments like:

"...Christians who look at the Bible less literally...argue that the Gospels never quote Jesus talking specifically about homosexuality..."

Quite an odd thing for a liberal to say when you think about it. If you don't look at the Bible literally, why would it matter what Jesus did or didn't say? You'd have to think that Jesus' silence on an issue should be taken literally, wouldn't you? For that matter, why not just make something up and attribute it to him? What would it matter?

Soon we'll hear liberals arguing things like:

"Christians who look at the Bible less literally, argue that the Gospels never quote Jesus talking specifically about...rape, or...torture, or ... pedophilia, or ... sex with your pet hamster, or ..."

...Well, you get the point. It's another enthymeme, so, draw your own conclusion. I'm sure you're able. By the way, this style of argument has been known from ancient times as an "Appeal to Ignorance" and it's usually committed by someone who has a lot of it.

Finally, Mr. Dean closed with a threat. He said that if Republicans "push" the homosexual issue, he'll talk "issues that unite us." What issues are those? Why, health insurance for every American!

Yepper, Howie, that'll sure get me on board -- no dissension there!

On a lighter note, the European Union's Beagle 2 lander touched down on Mars Christmas Day ... and promptly went awol. It was partially French made, wasn't it? Probably, it surrendered on impact.