Submitted by: Randi Koeske
Attendees: 21 (at maximum); 18 counted on professional role
Facilitators: 6
Discussion format: 2 small groups self generated discussion with facilitators
A quick count of our informal poll (when 21 were present) included:
· 2 Asst Professors
· 1 Assoc Professor
· 10 Staff
· 6 Students
· 8 with Children
· 6 with elder care issues
· 18 married
In the “with Children” subgroup I helped facilitate (with Darlene Zellars), the “wheel” exercise yielded:
· 3 expressed dissatisfaction with home/work or family balance
· 4 with social/cultural outlets (who has time for these?)
· 1 with all areas
· 2 with physical and health concerns
Participants introduced themselves and mentioned a desire to talk about/their biggest problem being:
· balancing professional success with good mothering
· waiting for career advancement because of having a toddler
· the demands of balancing home and professional life with a 2-year old
· being a single parent with care for a frail elder while holding down a very responsible job
· having become career-oriented after staying at home with own children but now having responsibility for an elder and a daughter with children who has her own career ambitions
· dealing with an 8 and 12 year old who are too old for day camps, especially during the summer but needing to assist an 84-year old stroke victim also
· having a 2 and 4 year old and yet wanting to advance professionally
· having a 6 and 8 year old plus professional responsibilities; as an HR staff member, she sees many single young people who complain about the scheduling flexibility extended to those on staff with children – they may need more awareness and a sense that, if needed, the same will be extended to them someday (comment that singles want time off for pleasure whereas parents usually want it off for some additional family responsibility)
· having quit job as a young woman and put career on back burner, then embraced career, now have daughter with own career needs who may want grandchild care when the time comes and mother already has an elderly (difficult) parent to care for; problem of saying no and feeling guilty; problem of not wanting to behave as did when younger (when everyone else’s needs came first)
· having a grown son with emotional problems and a sense of guilt that her working when he was a teen may have contributed to his current problems
Some issues that were discussed included:
· supervisors (academics) assuming that staff are or should be available 24/7 and not respecting boundaries (such as e-mailing on weekend and expecting work to be done on Monday morning); work at home is great for flexibility but guidelines are needed so it isn’t abused and so work done off-site is respected and “counted” – until the University provides home computers/home access, shouldn’t time at home be considered off time?
· help is needed with supervisor sensitivity on above issues and issues affecting women, staff, people with particular family or personal needs – some discussion ensued about the difficulty of coming up with general guidelines, but maybe encouragement for supervisors to talk with staff, students, faculty about their needs and work something out instead of assuming “one size fits all”
· others suggested not guidelines but a “philosophy” to guide faculty/staff coordination and sensitivity to work/family conflicts
· helping and encouraging women or families to engage in personal bartering so they can maintain balance and flexibility and switch with or help others on a rotating/cooperative basis
· maybe each department or school could be expected to come up with its own basic guidelines, making sure they’re consistent with an overall diversity-sensitive “philosophy”
· expand child care availability in Oakland, have referrals or quicker movement through waiting list – current program only serves some and there’s a long waiting list
· attention needed to school delays and cancellations for kids and how parents are affected by these
· permitting brief “breaks” for attending to personal business might address this and other matters that have to be handled during daytime hours, as long as total hours is the amount contracted
· faculty don’t keep specific hours and there are fewer ways for faculty to challenge the idea that they should just be working all the time, so some sensitivity to this among administrators is needed, especially before tenure is awarded
Other comments mentioned:
· learning to plan and control for oneself (sharing tips, strategies, having website of ideas)
· gender issues – women tend to worry about these things more than men; guilt is more of an issue for women; may need to feel support/permission for setting boundaries, making demands
· self-care and health maintenance are important stress reducers
· whether or not one has a partner (or a helpful partner) to assist with various family responsibilities makes a difference – there are different issues for single parents or those with a partner whose work schedule is inflexible or inconveniently located
· Falk school (since it’s University related) could be more sensitive to the problems of scheduling parent-teacher conferences and special presentations during the day when working parents are usually unavailable; all schools should be in today’s world
Surveys/feedback sheets/suggestion box sheets were passed out to small-group
participants but they may not have sent them back in
Some seemed to feel the time spent was interesting and would support more regular get-togethers. Others left early and one said little, so it’s hard to know their views.